Just Another Bend In Journey of Life
Thursday, August 25, 2005
Where to even begin? I have this gift of giving my friends the best advice as to what they should do in certain situations, and I normally do a pretty damn good job. The biggest problem I have is... myself. When it comes to myself being in a situation and trying to figure out whether I should follow my head, heart or gut, 9/10 I choose the wrong one. Never fails. And then I have to wonder why I get myself into the situations I do! Amazing! I must have a gift of some sort. Backing up a few months... January, I went on a blind date or sorts with a guy. It was wonderful. We hit it off sooo good. We had a lot of the same goals in life, same things in common. You know everything that you look for on a first date. He was handsome with some of the most adorable dimples that I have ever seen in my life. I swear you could fit a rock in them! They were so big and so noticable every time he smiled, or even just spoke for that matter. We ended up actually spending the whole weekend together, which we hadn't planned on, but we had such a good time and had planned on meeting the following weekend. (He lives a couple of hours away.) Things happened and it just didn't end up happening. We'd either talk daily or IM. Well, then the calls and IM's became less frequent. It was really strange. Of course I assumed the worst-- he'd found someone else. How could this wonderful man that I'd hit it off so well with want someone else?! AUGH! Well, without going into great detail (very long story) come to find out that he had some medical issues that he had to deal with. Understandable. I'm a very patient person and could completely understand what he was going through. Well, like I said, the phone calls and IM's were getting to the point they were non existant but he'd reasure me every time we spoke that he was still interested. Blah blah blah... I finally sucked it up and stopped calling him thinking that if he really wanted to talk to me, he'd call. Ya well, he didn't call. Imagine that. I got over it. No big deal. This past weekend a friend and I decided to get out of town for some fun. She knew someone that lived in the town that he lives in so we decided to go there. Of course, me being me, called him to see what he was up to. He met up with us for a beer and then went back home to do his own thing. I spoke with him again before I left and of course Mr. Charmer apoligized up and down for what he did and how he acted (and oh so convincingly may I add!). DUMB ME FELL FOR IT!!! Like I told my friend I give most people the benefit of the doubt, he has my doubt with benefits! Anyway, he asked me to go to Mackinaw Island with him. He "seemed" (key word) to have changed and got his life back in order. He was thinking with a clear mind. He said he'd call me the next day to make plans, that was Sunday. I still hadn't heard from him by Tuesday so I left a nice message for him to the effect of him not changing etc.. What do I care? I mean, screw me once shame on you, screw me twice shame on me! That's about it!!! Total jackass as far as I'm concerned. Probably doesnt' help that he's an (in house) attorney so he knows how to talk the talk.
So, rewind back to July... I'm with Becky in Marquette during Food Fest. What a blast that was! Well, one guy in particular that had caught a friends eye was in town for a wedding and was supposed to be at a bar with the wedding party after the dress rehersal so we HAD to go there. I'm sure anyone can relate to that. Anyway, we're there and meet up with him. We're all standing around talking and I see this tall, blonde-spikey haired, Mark McGrath looking guy dressed in khaki shorts, long sleeve white dress shirt and these freakin' black water shoe/sandle things on his feet. Me being me grabbed a hold of his arm and said something like "You wouldn't happen to be from CA would you?!" Total sarcasm. I hadn't even seen his face but that was just what he reminded me of. Total surfer dude. Well, he turns around and has this adorable smile with these monsterous dimples!!! (I've never thought about it until now but I think I have a thing for dimples?!) I have no idea what it was that he said to me but I made a comment about having the same dimples right above my ass. Ya, that's me! Let's just shout out the first thing that comes to your mind!!! DUH! Well it wasn't so bad 'cause I got his attention and we started chatting. Come to find out he's in a band and he's playing for the wedding. Somehow, hockey got mixed up in the conversation and they were talking about how they all play hockey so I had to start checking for hockey asses (They're the best!!! Nice and tight!!!) So, I come from a small town and I'm thinking he plays for some rinky dink band and plays Old Timers hockey like the rest of the people from up here... More on that later. Anyway, we're chatting and having a good ol time. All of a sudden some chick is glaring at me and they're in deep conversation so I ask the guy that I'd met that was in the wedding party if they're "together"? He says no. So I'm like "GAME ON!!!" I'm always up for a good challenge! :) She was drunk anyway. :) So needless to say, yes it was the pure challenge of it all that intrigued me the most. Ok, he was hot too. But I knew that I could take her. :) (How's that for confidence?!) Well, he tried getting me to come back to his hotel with him but I couldn't. No way. I stayed at the bar with Becky and we had a good time. Got back to her house and I did end up going back. Not for long, but I went to the hotel just to see what he was all about. I did stay at Becky's that night just so you know. We had good conversation and I gave him my number. Actually, not long after I got there we heard a knock on the door. I'm laughing my ass off 'cause I KNOW that it's the other chick from the bar!!! (Nothing like having a back up huh!?) He's trying to tell me that it's his keyboard player and I'm just laughing at the whole situation. It was hilarious! I still can't decide if I thought it was funnier 'cause she thought she was gonna get some, because I was there first, or because he was trying so hard to convince me that it wasn't her. Whatever! Either way you look at it, it was funny. In my eyes anyway. I was laughing so hard while she was knocking I had him laughing. Hilarious! I WON!!! Hahaha!!! Take that bitch! :) So, I had to leave early the next morning to pick up my daughter so I really was on a good behavior, maybe not my best, but a good one nonetheless. Anyway, I called him on my way out of town the next morning to see how I could get a hold of him and he said to check out his website. Well, I had about an 8 hour drive ahead of me so it was nothing that I could do at that point in time. But I did check it out when I got home. Holy crap! The guys got a really good legit band (just released a CD) AND used to play for the NHL and over in Europe. Imagine that!? Hmm... think he's done that before?! As in picking up (or trying to pick up) more than one chick at the bar? Anyway, I did give him my number and guess what? He called every single day. Well, maybe not every single day but I'd say minimum of 4 days out of the week. Nice. He offered to fly me down to see him and put me up in a hotel. Needless to say, he comes with baggage, which I'm not even going to get into right now. That'll have to be a whole different post. This weekend I'm leaving to fly out to VA to pick up my daughter. Her dad refused to fly her into Detroit so I'm driving down there and then flying out to get her, go school shopping etc. and then flying back and going to the zoo and to visit relatives. Well, since I'm going to be in the area he had me talked into putting me up at a hotel and going to see his band play Friday and Saturday nights. At first I was all for it. How much fun would that be?! Watching a hot guy play in his band, maybe he'll even sing a song for me??? (Ya right!) Well, then I slowing changed my mind and became very undecided as to what I'm going to do. His calls are coming in less frequent and my gut tells me not to go. Sure it'd be fun but it is what it is and I do know that. I gues the question I have to ask myself is whether or not I really want to put myself into that situation. Sure it sounds good now but I have a feeling that things will be very different when I'm actually there. Not only that but I'll be in a bar full of people that I don't know. How's that going to work? I mean, is anyone going to talk to me? Then if I'm talking to some guy is he going to get upset or whatever? Not that it really matters I guess.... Tomorrow is another day and I'll probably have yet another idea in my head as to what I'm going to do. Who knows? I leftboth a message and an email for him today to call me back with my direct work number and what does he do? Calls me at home and leaves a message. Does that make any sense what so ever!? So what do I do? Leave him another message on his cell asking why he called me at home when I'd asked him to call me at work and how did he know that I wasn't calling to tell him that I wasn't coming down? You wanna play that game?! You can but I'm better at it! (Well I like to think I am anyway!) It's not that I wasn't honest, I mean, I still have no idea what I'm doing. All I know is that I have to make sure my ass is on a flight out Sunday afternoon!
Whoa, I guess I'll end there for now. Once I get going I just don't stop. I think this is good enough for the first entry anyway. And I feel much better! :)
Wednesday, August 24, 2005
ME
